Restaurant Review - The Sportsman, Seasalter

The Sportsman, Faversham Road, Seasalter, Whitstable, Kent, CT5 4BP

Food **** / Service **** / Ambience *** (around £45 per head including wine)

The Sportsman is a gem of a restaurant in a town of crashing waves, stilted sea huts and passers through.

I don’t live anywhere near Kent. I reside north of London (the centre of the universe of course). Therefore the notion of “going for lunch” to this particular restaurant involved a good four and a half hour round trip including half hour in the scenic Dartford Tunnel car park.

Encouraged by my ever-adventurous employer, I was told The Sportsman was one of the best places she’d ever eaten. For someone as widely respected as she is, the offer to visit simply couldn’t be turned down.

The Sportsman is an average sized housing estate looking building on the coast road. Sea-shanty style huts, holiday rents and caravan parks line the narrow lanes leading to the restaurant, indicating the seasonal nature of life in these parts. The sun was breaking through a thin veil of cloud on the Thursday afternoon of our visit and the building’s light, clean and wooden interior looked particularly fresh on our arrival.

Received into the bar with a welcome pint of Guinness (why is it a passenger journey is always longer than a driver journey?) we selected from a lunch menu that was heavy on fish and emphasised some interesting choices of flavour.

Oddly enough we were urged to make our choice while crowded around the one chalked up menu du jour and then shown to our table, selecting a well priced bottle of Gavi to begin (£16.95).

The five of us were seated on a lengthy wooden table (on a crowded boat I could imagine four times our number crowded around devouring fresh catch) overlooking the herb garden. Fresh focaccia, soda bread and olives got the juices flowing and starters of Pork Terrine – light, gelatinous and salty – and Mackerel on Toast with Horseradish - although light on the kick from Horseradish - were well received.

The real admiration was reserved for the headline act. A beautifully pink rump of marshland lamb (surely farmed only a stone’s throw away) was full of flavour as was a Seabass fillet with a mussel tartare arriving in a simmering broth of cooking juices. A perfectly sized Brill was taken by two of the party and both praised the full flavour and freshness of their choices.

Desserts consisted of a cheese selection, an ice-cold life affirming banana parfait and a naughty dark chocolate mousse with milk sorbet and salted caramel- we realised we’d made it through purgatory. Double espressos all round prepared us for the journey home.

Worth a visit, The Sportsman produces exceptionally fresh, beautifully tasting food by the great British seaside. The service, from a team of four ladies, had the perfect mix of youth and experience, presence and absence. Norah Jones played through the dusty Bose speakers.

Behind it's whitewashed exterior, The Sportsman is a gem of a restaurant in a town of crashing waves, stilted sea huts and passers through. Long may this outstanding food haven continue.

Steve McNeill

Pee Wee Ellis, Ronnie Scott's, London W1, 5/4/10

Live Review

Pee Wee Ellis & his Jazz Quartet @ Ronnie Scott’s, London W1, Monday 5/4/10

**** (Really quite good)

Did you know you are not allowed to take pictures in Ronnie Scott’s? (My excuse for the poor picture here.)

You are, however, obliged to mingle with some of music’s greatest talents.

On previous occasions I have found myself backstage with the superb Carleen Anderson and attempting to embrace the legendary Dr John as he made his way through the club.

On Monday night I ended up, stood on a Soho pavement, offering the great saxophonist and bandleader Pee Wee Ellis a smoke and explaining my favourite Pee Wee sax solo was when he took Van Morrison’s “Tupelo Honey” to another level during a performance at Montreux in 1980.

This moment of admiration outside a packed Ronnie Scott’s was one of many on an evening in which Ellis’ skills as a saxophonist, bandleader and all-round great guy were on show.

Pee Wee Ellis now resides in Frome, Somerset and had bought with him a homeboy, fellow tenor sax player Josh Arcoleo. The youngster, blessed with fantastic ability and tone added a touch of youth to a line up that was experienced and highly skilled.

Pee Wee’s theme for Monday night was jazz (he returned Tuesday evening with his Funk Assembly). However, the two highlights of the show came with a break from the tight, yet highly improvisational nature of the performance with a little blues number that swaggered with real character and “a song I wrote for James Brown” called “Chicken”. The soul vibe took the show up a notch.

Ronnie’s is a great place to see some great up-and-coming talent alongside famous names from the past. Pee Wee Ellis was James Brown’s musical director (JB Horns) and arranged Van Morrison’s live shows for years at the prime of his powers (Into The Music and onwards). His reputation is enough to sell a club full of tickets. His performance was good enough to sell more.

At 68, Ellis is no spring chicken. But his musicianship is still outstanding. In Arcoleo, he has found a saxophonist that will gain so much from being onstage with one of the most influential horn players in soul and funk music - and the youngster confidently holds his own against a seriously big name in sax music.

So excuse my poor picture taking… but Pee Wee and his band really were too good to take your eyes off.

Steve McNeill

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Imagine clicking to view this blog, or any other online article and being told you had to pay. That’s what will happen when The Times and The Sunday Times begins charging users to view its online content.

Rupert Murdoch may be the most powerful media tycoon in the country, but his opinion towards the internet, as quoted in The Independent on Saturday (March 27^th) is nothing short of outrageous.

That one man believes he can halt the trend of a global internet news marketplace in favour of preserving physical newspaper sales is absurd.

Michael Wolff, Murdoch’s biographer said, “He does not care about the online business, it’s about “buy my newspaper I will give you something extra [on the fact that Times and Sunday Times subscribers will have free online access]. If you don’t, I’m going to make the cost of online reading really quite onerous.” Rupert wants to be the guy that saved newspapers. He hates the internet.”

Isn’t that just insane? We are a news junky society. We consume news like we breathe air. I regularly read The Times Online and enjoy articles and comment by the likes of Jeremy Clarkson, Giles Coren and A A Gill.

Will I pay £1 a day or £2 a week to access this information in the future? I bloody doubt it.

I’d probably just buy the paper.

Steve McNeill

MUSICIAN FOCUS - Herbie Hancock

I have recently been researching and writing an article called “The ten greatest jazz pianists”. As a pianist myself who loves jazz (note I can’t call myself a jazz pianist) its been great fun. I’ve listened to some incredible music and discovered a lot of interesting information about “the ten greatest…” and although the definition of opinion dictates few people will agree with my run-down, I feel I can justify my top ten list.

Herbie Hancock is not just one of the most influential jazz musicians that has walked this earth – he is one of the most influential musicians of all time. He continues to embrace new music while remaining fresh and innovative.

One of my favourite records of 2009 was Hancock’s album The Joni Letters, a tribute to his long-time friend Joni Mitchell. The album was only the second jazz album to ever win the Grammy Award for Best Album (do you know what the first was?). Featuring collaborations with Norah Jones, Corrine Bailey-Rae, Leonard Cohen, Tina Turner and more, The Joni Letters is a masterclass in jazz piano. Hancock’s rearrangements of classic songs like “Case of You” and “Both Sides Now” stay faithful enough to the original chords and rhythms to be recognisable, yet venture far enough into Hancock virtuoso territory to be suitably outstanding works of musicianship.

My greatest admiration of Herbie comes from two of the best examples of jazz-fusion composition –“Watermelon Man” (1962) and “Cantaloupe Island” (1964). In both songs, the classic piano riffs are instantly recognisable and helped bring jazz to a more mainstream, pop-orientated audience.

Out of all the jazz greats, Hancock has incorporated other genres of music into jazz the most. As influential on hip-hop, funk and soul as he has been on jazz, Herbie continues to make great music, perform knockout shows and inspire countless other musicians (and non-musicians) across the world.

This video is a classic performance of the superb “Cantaloupe Island”. Composer, virtuoso, innovator… Enjoy a dose of the truly legendary Herbie Hancock.

The Misanthrope, Comedy Theatre, London, SW1

Theatre Review

The Misanthrope, Comedy Theatre, London, SW1, Wednesday 10th March 2010

**** (Very good: recommended)

As I write this review, I must confess I am not a regular theatre-goer. In fact, I haven’t set foot near a West End stage since I was 14 years old (even that wasn’t close, up in the Palladium’s roof-tiles). My comments about The Misanthrope are on face value and entertainment factor.

I cannot pretend that I was at the Comedy Theatre last night keen to see how Moliere’s “most famous comedy” has been interpreted for the London stage. I was there to see two of Britain’s best actors, well known for their silver screen soirées rather than their theatrical credits.

Damien Lewis and Kiera Knightly are the undoubted stars of the show. Their performances were well groomed (the show is in it’s final week) and elegant. Their communication was always clear and their characters convincing.

Lewis plays Alceste, a playwright who seems at every turn to be frustrated with everyone around him. Accusing others of shallowness and arrogance, his own weaknesses are clear for the audience and other characters to see.

Alceste’s love interest Jennifer (Kiera Knightly), is an American actress who lives by the “life is a stage” cliché. Knightly pulls off the American accent with consistency, although at times the nasal texture of some words fills the room. Ironically, Alceste loves Jennifer for all her faults – faults that he despairs at the rest of society for.

One scene in particular – just after an interval, which was more at the three quarter mark than the halfway point – had the audience consumed with tension and anticipation. As Alceste and Jennifer migrate from hatred of each other to lust, Lewis executes a well-rehearsed slap and the play steamrolls towards the final scene in which Jennifer is revealed as back stabbing and self-centered. Didn’t see that one coming.

The play teaches us that everyone (at least in this portrayed media world) is selfish – we are all out for ourselves. When Jennifer’s malicious comments about her ‘friends’ are revealed, we see, one-by-one, how none of them gives a shit (the journalist files her story, the drama-teacher rejoices at seeing her name in the paper and the fellow actor has another attempt to bury his face in the furry cup).

Much to the misanthrope’s despair, Jennifer tosses his fantasy of eloping with her into the wind. She isn’t interested in leaving her world behind. Maybe she was only interested in Alceste for matters of professional interest, despite her early insistence, “I love you… and I don’t use that word lightly”. An actress is never off duty.

Backed up by a superb supporting cast, the two stars turn on a great show. The script is humorous yet serious, filled with wit and irony at every turn.

The Misanthrope is a play that can be enjoyed on face value. Critics will look beyond at the degree to which it is faithful both to the original script and the Martin Crimp reworking. I simply enjoyed it.

Steve McNeill

David Ford - Let The Hard Times Roll

David Ford – Let The Hard Times Roll (Original Signal Recordings)

A musical masterclass from the Eastbourne troubadour

***** (Outstanding)

“I don’t really understand how I have been allowed to continue for so long given my phenomenal lack of commercial success. What I have come to believe is that the honesty of music might just stand a chance against the tried and tested bullshit of the machine. Not a great chance, but a chance nonetheless.”

So blogged David Ford on his website, just prior to the digital release of Let The Hard Times Roll, his new studio album.

In the last five years I can count on less than two hands the number of albums that have reaffirmed my faith in great music. After ten years of trying, Ford sounds like the real deal.

Let The Hard Times Roll is Ford’s proving ground. In this arena he demonstrates an innate ability to glide from the powerful and majestic to the vulnerable and questioning. Humanity and politics are the adrenaline running through the bloodstream of this record.

Opener “Panic” breaks into drama at the halfway point, stylistically reminiscent of classic Josh Ritter while “Sylvia” strolls along with overtones of Oasis’ “She’s Electric”.

In some ways, Ford is competing on Ryan Adams territory. But Adams could never make a record like this. The depth and focus of the lyrics are crafted somewhere between the poetic and the genius and are at their strongest on the simple, heartbreaking “Stephen” and the resigning, condemning “Nothing At All”. It is during the latter that Ford’s lyrical precision shines through, “In some far-flung aggression/kids are dying for me/I am nothing at all/like I wanted to be”.

The album closer “Call to Arms” is the most overtly political song on the record. But Ford tempers his demands with love, “This is a call to arms/hold your darling tight/don’t let her go at the fork in the road”. His message – stick together. Make your decisions with belief and love. Fight for honesty and truth. The songs ending feels like an opportunity missed to bring the album to an epic close, with Ford instead choosing a choir-like hymnal finale and a slightly awkward key change.

I have always believed that the honesty of music might just stand a chance against “the bullshit of the machine.” Let The Hard Times Roll reaffirms my belief in real songwriting. It is a craft borne out of hard graft, an understanding of the world we live in and the ability to translate that understanding into something more than just words. Add to these skills David Ford’s outstanding musicianship and Let The Hard Times Roll will hold it’s own as one of the finest records of the year.

David Ford is taking his solo show on tour to Canada and the US until March 26^th. In the UK, don’t miss him with his full band in Leeds - Brudenell Social Club (April 11^th), Newcastle – The Kluny 2 (April 12^th) and London – Camden Koko (April 13^th).

Steve McNeill

Groove Armada, Forum, London NW5 3/3/10

Live Review

Groove Armada @ Forum, Kentish Town, London NW5 – Wednesday 3/3/10

** (solid performance)

Pulling in a packed house to Kentish Town’s Forum on Wednesday night, Tom Findlay and Andy Kato’s Groove Armada seemed keen to leave their arrival on stage to the very last minute.

Perhaps concerned that the crowd would still be funneling out of nearby boozers having watched the most anticipated England friendly in years, Groove Armada finally emerged at nearly a quarter to ten.

Huge applause, massive sound and a great venue, Forum was packed to the rafters with a crowd that was more experienced than baby faced but still punched its fair share of appreciative youth.

Introducing a heavy load of new material from recent album Black Light, the band met with a warm early reception. Too many seemed uninterested in new singer SaintSaviour – a bleach-blonde futuristic reincarnation of La Roux with a penchant for Yoga-style arm workouts.

In contrast, when long-time collaborator MC M.A.D landed, the show took off. Effortlessly guiding the band through Get Down, M.A.D’s performance went down a treat. A return to the stage in the encore saw the band finish with a rollicking Superstylin’ creating chaos in every corner of the venue.

Underneath the tripping laser show (no drugs were consumed by the writer), Groove Armada lacked true musicianship, leaving the show rather two-dimensional. A going-through-the-motions approach to Ibiza classic At The River had more than a few people wanting more in an encore that was worth the entry fee alone.

Everything was solid – everything sounded fine – everyone enjoyed the show. Black Light may demonstrate that Groove Armada’s sound is changing, but their live act still shows they are a band that can easily operate at the highest level.

Leaving themselves just an hour and fifteen minutes to wow an audience that could probably have danced all night was a hard task. Unfortunately tonight, Groove Armada didn’t quite hit the mark.

Steve McNeill

BBC 6 Music and Asian Network for the chop

The BBC has dismissed a newspaper report that 6Music and the Asian Network are to be closed as “speculation” - but speculation is often rooted in truth.

Last week 6Music was told to grow it’s audience. This week rumours fly that it will be axed as the BBC looks to cut costs.

BBC 6Music is a digital radio station broadcasting everything that Radio1 and Radio2 won’t. It offers a valuable leg up to younger and often more vibrant broadcasters. It deliberately strays away from the mainstream of 1 and 2. It is, by its nature, less popular – alternative (arguably defined as “not mainstream”) always is. By growing it’s audience, does this mean selling the soul of 6Music?

If 6Music and the Asian Network were axed under the guise of cost cutting, I would be angered at the continuation of paying Chris Moyles £650,000 a year for presenting a breakfast radio show.

If the taxpayer is looking for justification, why don’t we start with Moyles? This isn’t a personal attack. I catch his show sometimes and find him quite amusing - but no more so than listening to George Lamb on 6Music. Moyles' salary is sickening. What are the chances of most of us being able to pull in that kind of money doing a ‘normal’ job? And that’s not bitterness. If the BBC were commercially funded, I wouldn’t have a problem with Moyles earning that much. Radio 1 can only pay it’s presenters this kind of money because it isn’t commercially funded. It doesn’t make business sense does it? (See how you feel when a license fee hike is announced and you find out how much Jonathan Ross pulls in).

Between Moyles and Ross, the BBC is wasting money on superficially ‘talented’ individuals who are part of teams that make great radio and TV shows. Let’s not forget the producers, assistants and sidekicks that make the shows humorous, engaging and witty. Radio and TV presenters are not a one-man-band.

So BBC, listen up. We admire you for allowing the development of alternative radio stations. Don’t pull the plug when things get tough. Don’t lose respect because it’s what you think you should do.

Show support for the underdog and save Radio6.

Steve McNeill

Restaurant Review - The Luxe, Spitalfields

Restaurant Review

The Luxe Spitalfields, 109 Commercial Street, London E1 6BG

Food ** / Service *** / Ambience ****

Great location, amiable unpretentious staff – disappointing food.

“This competition just gets tougher”. How many times have we heard John Torode announce this over the opening chimes of BBC Masterchef? I have a hunch that life at The Luxe is getting tougher.

Being in the bar and restaurant business, I am unusual in the sense that I don’t like to criticise small things when the overall experience is excellent. The waiter may have his tie-knot slightly loose but if the food is good and he’s polite and attentive, I couldn’t give two hoots. Likewise, the service may be a bit on the slow side and the place a little quiet, but if the food is spot on, I’ll leave a happy man. Two and a half years ago I visited Smiths of Smithfield, Torode’s original London project. The experience was good but nothing to make you return with haste.

When the food – let’s face it, the overriding reason you are sat in a restaurant, knife and fork at the ready - is disappointing, then I’m a bit narked off. At The Luxe, disappointment is one of more costly items on the menu.

Valentine’s Day in the restaurant industry is a chance to make some money. There shouldn’t be too much trouble filling tables. Filling coffers is the challenge – ensuring you can persuade those glamorous wives to prise open the wallets of their scrooge-like husbands is more than half the battle. After working all Valentine’s weekend, I took my girlfriend, herself a glamorous other half to bloke with a tight wallet, on a soiree to Spitalfields.

Having spent a little time around Spitalfields (a couple of gigs and the odd restaurant) in the past, I’ve always enjoyed the vibe of the area. Unpretentious but stylish - bit of dirt around the edges. Proper London Guv’nor. The ambience of The Luxe, despite being an immaculately done up building, preserves my out-of-town-but-still-a-London-regular idealism of Shoreditch.

Ordering a bottle of 2009 NZ Sauvignon to accompany us for the evening (I prefer a red but after a recent Paris trip, I have still failed to convert mademoiselle to the rouger berries delight’s) we set about choosing from the well balanced menu. “I could eat every single starter on here and am stuck between three main courses” the loved one exclaimed as we desperately staved off fits of overheating from the blazing radiator behind her and the open-kitchen of 20 hot lamps behind me.

Mrs. Steve settled for salt & pepper squid rings teased with a sweet chilli sauce that had a welcome kick to it. My cured ham and mozzarella salad was light on the mozzarella and heavy on the salad, although a salty stick of black olive toast saved the dish from complete disenchantment. “How is the beef? I haven’t tried that one,” asked the friendly (and for once English) waitress. Nervously laughing I explained it was the ham and mozzarella salad. “Sorry!” she blushed, “the man next to you has ordered the beef!”

The good lady’s main course of halibut with roast tomatoes was reportedly as tasty as it looked, complemented by some unannounced wilted spinach. My smoked haddock with lobster mash and a poached egg was the most uninspiring serving of fish this side of Loch Fyne. The pan had dried the haddock to give the impression it was Sahara farmed and the mash was on the verge of being scientifically frigid. The same wilted spinach was to be found hiding under my desert fish. Glancing behind at a steak waiting for service, I hung my head in a moment of regret.

A perfect sharer of Tiramisu sweetened my opinion slightly, both of us agreeing it was one of the best we’d tasted. The balance between lingering coffee and alcoholic kick married with the textures of the sponge and fresh cream perfectly. Last orders called at half ten signalled we should really finish the wine and head home. Not forgetting to pay the bill. At just over £100 for 2 and a bit courses plus wine, The Luxe won’t break the bank – but it won’t represent value for money either.

I wonder how, being faced with such uninspirational food on Masterchef, Mr Torode would react. Perhaps he has taken his eye off The Luxe after the food press set it up with positive opening weekend reviews. To be a great restaurant, great food needs to be served every night – every night needs to be the Masterchef final. Unfortunately, we could only get tickets to the practice round.

Steve McNeill

Corinne Bailey-Rae - The Sea

Corinne Bailey-Rae - The Sea (Good Groove/Virgin)

Melancholy meets masterful on wistful soul songstresses’ new arrival ****

To many, Corinne Bailey-Rae is still defined by the two singles that launched her onto the UK music scene back in 2006. “The Sea” doesn’t quite represent a goodbye to the feel-good soul vibe of “Put Your Records On” but the record certainly suggests a changed woman.

“The Sea” is an album that intertwines life and death. The loss of her husband (saxophonist Jason Rae) plays a significant role in some of the songs and performances here, creating equally great moments of tragedy and triumph.

Eyes to heaven, Bailey-Rae begins with “Are You Here” a calling card to her lost love and in the context of her recent bereavement it’s obvious that the vocal and instrumental anguish here is real. Gladly enough Bailey-Rae doesn’t dwell on despair throughout the entire record. A classic-sounding soul romp “The Blackest Lily” is enough to keep the foot tapping for the remainder of the record and “Paris Nights/New York Mornings” is an affirmation of life in the fast lane –a steadfast commitment to staying alive.

Facing death with elegance and style has resulted in an album that is a tribute to a man who is credited with opening a young Corrine’s eyes to the delights of jazz and soul. The production, at a moments notice swells from low-key to epic on several tracks and Bailey-Rae’s at times whimpering vocal is in danger of being swamped by the orchestral emotion – but she always pulls it through.

Caught up in the web she spins its Corrine’s emotion that we feel – her loss and her tragedy. In the moments of darkness she finds light and beauty. Despite the surely cathartic nature of creating this record, Bailey-Rae has dredged up a mini masterpiece that leaves us satisfied for now, but ultimately looking forward to the future.

Steve McNeill

"57 Channels and nothin' on"

On his 1992 album Human Touch, Bruce Springsteen included a swipe at the new couch potato, TV addicted generation that was growing up in America with the song "57 Channels (And Nothin' On)".

I was reading an article in The Independent a couple of weeks ago about a controversial billboard campaign by the news channel Russia Today (RT). The network was advertising in the UK and US with a poster of President Ahmadinejad and President Obama morphing into one under the words "Who poses the greater nuclear threat?"

I decided to investigate this RT network a little further. I find it mind-boggling that we have so many channels at our disposal on digital TV and still don't know what is at our fingertips. It turns out RT is owned by the Russian state. "Biased! Biased!" I hear you cry. Well, only as much as FOX News is in the US. When i was revising for my A-Level exams (the memory is getting ever more distant) i used to watch FOX while eating my lunch. Why? It was different from BBC News (bored me at the time) and not quite as tacky as SKY News (prior to the poaching of BBC news anchors). I can therefore vouch that FOX was as pro-Republican as RT is pro-Russia.

So can news ever be free from bias? The BBC has an obligation under OFCOM to produce news that is "free from political bias." Respected all over the world, i think it does a pretty good job.

RT's manifesto is to provide "an unbiased portrait of Russia". That's about as believable as Britney Spears claiming her recent album is an accurate portrayal of American life. What is does do is puts Russia's opinion forward to the west in the medium that we all now live with - digital TV. China (CCTV), The Middle East (Al-Jazeera), Europe (EuroNews), France (France 24) and the US (Fox News, CNN) are all represented by a 5-0-something channel in our homes. Russia needs to be there fight it's corner.

I have just finished an article examining the Russian government's tactics with regard to RT. The article discusses the poster campaign and the reasons behind the state owned TV station making it's presence so controversially felt in the West. I hope to post it here soon. An extract runs below.

One broadcaster, Russia Today, (RT –Sky Channel 512) has recently launched an advertising campaign across the UK and US. This has featured a poster of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad morphing into President Obama questioning, “Who poses the greater nuclear threat?” It has been banned from US airports and caused quite a stir wherever it has been displayed. Margarita Simonyan, the editor-in-chief of RT says the station’s intention is to present “an unbiased portrait of Russia”. RT is sponsored by the state owned Russian news agency RIA Novosti.

Phillip Hanson, Professor of the Political Economy of Russia at Birmingham University, fails to see what the controversial poster will achieve. “Maliciously linking Ahmedinajad and Obama doesn't fit Russian foreign policy. The Putin team is ambivalent about both of them, but at least seems currently to be cooperating with the US over sanctions on Iran.” RT can however guarantee that the head-turning billboards will get people discussing the channel and will bring the station to more prominence.

So are we a soft touch for allowing this kind of advertising on our streets? Such a poster featuring Prime Minister Putin would never be allowed in Russia. Professor Hanson believes that being a soft touch on issues such as freedom is expression isn’t such a bad thing, “…freedom of speech should be restricted only by a prohibition on incitement to violence.” Perhaps by banning the posters in their nations airports – spaces where sensitivity towards terrorism and patriotism are magnified – the US considers these an incitement to violence? More likely it is their own self-censorship that means they’re thrown in the can.

If Bruce Springsteen was writing his Human Touch album now, 57 Channels (And Nothin' On) might not be quite so true.

Accountability

Do we live in an age where no one is accountable for their actions? Can we simply do what we please without fear of facing the consequences? Is it OK for innocent, law abiding and honest people to continually get caught up in the web of misery that others have spun?

I had a great night out last Wednesday with a good friend of mine Ian and his cousin Dan who i hadn't met before. Ian played the usual devil's advocate (he loves sitting on that fence) the beer was flowing and the debate was getting lively... just how i like it. RBS bonuses were my tipple for the evening. They were getting me quite wasted in fact, like I'm sure they do for the thousands of employees that benefit from them - or taxpayers money - that is. How can we live in a country that shafts it's citizens left right and centre (more money on the price of beer) and then pays out state owned bank bonuses in the billions? Lest we forget our economy is in crisis because of these careless morons?

I'm not against the government bailing out the banks. I'm against the continuation of a system (in bonuses) that doesn't fit with the times of hardship so many are going through. My grandfather would never have believed such a think could happen under a Labour government. Who is accountable for allowing this to go on?

This week The Independent reported on a British company that sold a "bogus bomb detector" to Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Lebanon and Jordan. All these countries have suffered deadly suicide bomb attacks at checkpoints where this detector had been employed. The device is basically a piece of plastic with a metal aerial coming out of it. It's bomb detecting credentials are as laughable as watching Liverpool defend a corner. The head of the company who produced these "devices" and sold them for £45,000 a piece has been arrested. Is he going to be held accountable?

Now to the money question. "The War on Terror" (as FOX news so glamorously put it) and the enquiry as to who's fault it actually all was. Tony Blair is under question from the investigating committee as we speak. He ultimately made the decision on the British side. He acted on the evidence supplied to him. There are plenty of branches on the tree that should be accountable for all that has happened. Let's not pretend we can simply blame one person. 

Shakespeare's tragic Lady MacBeth could never wash her sins from her hands. I wonder if Mr Blair knows the way to the river of redemption or will the blood remain stained? He is not alone in the valley of mistake. The parents of the soldiers killed are not alone in the towns of grief. The innocent Iraqi's are not alone in the bombed out cities that are home to widows and bastards because of our mistakes.

Are we not all accountable for our countries actions? Maybe all we can do is try to find our own justice. That's what I'm accountable for. 

Shine like a Michelin Star

In the daytime (and evenings in fact), i moonlight as a bar/restaurant manager. Our place is great - fresh, local food in smart surroundings, open fires, friendly and attentive staff... i stop short of giving you our address. This means that, like a lot of us foodie people, i am a faux-snob when it comes to other eating and drinking establishments. My friends find it hilarious, "oh does this pub have enough character??" they jibe at me when arriving at a watering hole. In fact, it is all a facade! I love eating out. Always have done since i was a kid. I must have been about 8 years old when i went abroad with my parents for the first time to the Algarve. We stayed on the 13th and top floor of an apartment block called Janelas do Mar, a place in which my fear of lifts came sharply into focus (and may even have originated). That's another story. Being self-catered we would eat out every night. It was heaven. I could still do the same now although my excessive vino consumption would have to be curbed. 

Last Summer, my boss and her partner visited Nick Parkinson's (son of Michael, TV interviewer) pub/restaurant in Paley Street, Berkshire called The Royal Oak. They raved about it, "the best chips you'll ever taste". One of the best meals they'd ever had apparently and all they could talk about was the chips. Subsequently i am dispatched to stealthily investigate how they got them so good. I emailed The Royal Oak, ass-licked for a sentence or two and then asked the secret of "the best chips i've ever tasted." They emailed back the same evening... with the recipe. "Thanks for your comments Steve, you're not the only one! Here are the instructions."

In October last year, my boss took myself and our Head Chef over (i drove :( no wine for me). It just so happened that we dined next to Michael Parkinson himself who was having lunch with his son-come-manager. Service was a bit taut if you know what i mean. Not very relaxed. A bit stiff. Waiter didn't engage, waitress was on her second shift (so she told us) and was clearly nervous as hell to be serving the bosses next to us. At the time of eating, The Royal Oak held several titles including a Bib Gourmand. No wonder. The food was terrific. Lasagna of Wild Rabbit & Mushrooms was a stand out starter with dive caught Sole a real gem of a main. 

I have just read this morning that The Royal Oak has been awarded a Michelin star. That's the ultimate accolade really isn't it. I don't frequent restaurants and pubs in the stratosphere but i have dined in a couple. The Royal Oak deserves such an award for truly exceptional food. Each dish is a work of art. Each mouthful a moment to savour. 

The must-have side order of chips were sure as hell tasty. Several efforts on our behalf haven't quite managed to achieve Dominic Chapman's chip nirvana. We might as well give up trying and go back!

www.theroyaloakpaleystreet.com, Paley Street, Berkshire.

The Patience of the Father

Reading Jeremy Clarkson's Times Online blog reminded me of my not-so-close shave with the hyseria that Mamma Mia seemed to induce. It was one morning. I was sat in the office with my boss.

Imagine my concern when H (the chief) turns to me (i am a pub manager... she is the owner) and suggests that we run a Mamma Mia night. Ha! With the tactfulness of a confidante i smiled and laughed - hoping she was less than sober and that she wouldn't recall such a ridiculous comment in the morning. Oh no, i forgot, it was the morning. She was stone cold. The thought of a pub full (even an evening with my Mother and sister) singing along to the alternative anthology of Swedish Popular Song filled me with dread. There would be so much oestrogen in the room the ceilings would be pink. 

Suffice to say Mamma Mia ce soir hasn't occured yet. I can only admire JC's patience as a Father. I find that hard enough with just a girlfriend and a job and not even bringing kids into the equation. GOD! Please continue to think of me in your prayers. ;)